If You Met My Family, You Would Understand

Decorative sign stating, "If you met my family, you would understand"

Here are some fun sayings and quotations about family:

Some family trees have beautiful leaves, and some just have a bunch of nuts.
It is the nuts that make the tree worth shaking.

Friends come and go, but relatives tend to accumulate.

He who has no fools, knaves, or beggars in his family was begot by a flash of lightning.
—Old English proverb

If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance.
—George Bernard Shaw, Irish playwright

I don’t have to look up my family tree because I know that I’m the sap.
—Fred Allen, American comedian

Can a first cousin once removed be returned?

Striving for Simplicity

Here is a lovely example of visual irony that made me smile:

A sign reading "Simplify" is almost covered by a stack of paperwork

Further irony—Hanging below the “Simplify” sign, covered by the stack of paperwork, is a great quotation:

“Simple, clear purpose and principles give rise to complex and intelligent behavior. Complex rules and regulations give rise to simple and stupid behavior.”
—Dee Hock, American businessman

As the photo illustrates, sometimes one falls behind in the quest for simplicity. However, there is always hope:

“Ah, but a man’s reach should exceed his grasp,
Or what’s a heaven for?”
—Robert Browning, English poet

 

“The size of your dreams must always exceed your current capacity to achieve them. If your dreams do not scare you, they are not big enough.”
—Ellen Johnson Sirleaf, president of Liberia

In my own quest to simplify, clarify, and organize my mind and my life, I’ve found David Allen’s Getting Things Done model and method to be very helpful.

 

Three in One Day!

My inner copyeditor was gleeful when it came across three fun real-life errors in one day!

A Perspective on the Prospective Employee

This paragraph is from a work email introducing an employee taking on a new position.

An email conflating "prospective" and "perspective."

Prospective—an adjective meaning “likely to happen at a future date; concerned with or applying to the future.”

Perspective—a noun meaning “a particular attitude toward or way of regarding something; a point of view.”

In our regional dialect, many people likely pronounce “perspective” as “prospective.” I suppose we all know what is meant—even if we don’t know how to spell it or say it.

An Unusual Date

This is a flyer from our local ski resort:

A flyer announcing an event on January 23th

The date is pronounced “twenty-thirth,” I imagine.

The Curious Case of the Canine Dog

This paragraph is from a news article about electronics-sniffing police dogs.

A news article conflating "canine dog" and "K-9" dog

I can only imagine that the officer quoted in the article was referring to a “K-9 dog”—which we all know is a term for a police dog—and the reporter recorded this as “canine dog”—which just looks redundant and silly.

Shopping for the Zombie Apocalypse

Smith & Edwards is a weird and wonderful store located in Northern Utah. Visiting Smith & Edwards is always a delight!

A sign for the zombie apocalypse department of the Smith & Edwards storeAppropriately enough, in the Zombie Apocalypse department—among other emergency preparedness supplies—you can find this stylish 15″ Zombie Slasher Machete.

A zombie slasher machete for sale